Complexes saved my Ego, my will to live and I am thankful.
I used to think that complexes required me to fix them. I know better now, that they once saved my life and now stand as a testament that I am still here.
This all started when I asked myself - why do contractures exist? Contractures, stroke, inability to use a muscle otherwise capable of movement. Since movement is life - all living things move - why then did the contracture develop? What caused it? Why does my body hate me?
Complexes are described as parts of our personality that eventually inhibit choice - there comes a point where your personality does not allow you certain behaviors and complexes are the part of you that “just can’t”. This reminded me of contractures - you just can’t move that muscle anymore.
Useless?
Definitely stubborn, resistant and inhibiting in the case of wanting to progress into something more than your current life. Most people with contractures do not have high aspirations for their body, especially that area.
So, what is the similarity between contractures and complexes - they both inhibit. Let’s see how contractures are formed.
When the body suffers an injury, the brain sends a signal to the surrounding muscle tissue to form a fibroblast cell - which hardens the tissue, ultimately protecting any damaged blood vessels surrounding the area. It can be thought of as a shield to keep the damage from spreading. We know these as scars - tissue that hardens beyond belief in order to mitigate damage to a localized area. The problem is then why then, if the damage is passed, do the fibroblasts clock out and go home for the day? That’s the brains fault - as it seems there is no regulator to shut these diligent workers off. And so they work, hardening the tissue and eventually disabling the muscle to a contracture.
For the body, this means what once had strength and flexibility, is all strength now, as the muscle contractures beyond health - but believe me, it is still strong, as it always contracts, never extends. And there is stays, hardens and fixes, limiting movement and certainly choice.
So, the brain received the signal that injury was occurring and sent plenty of fibroblasts to contain the damage so that healing could occur. For the fibroblasts provide a protective shield so that, if gentle movement can reoccur, the tissue can start to become flexible again - and no contracture take place. But sometimes, the fibroblasts just keep coming. Their presence overwhelms the healing process and that part of the body just seems to be written off as damaged.
What was the brain thinking?
Well, this is where I speculate, although there is some research to point towards my thought - you see, the fibroblasts move through the entire body - they can go anywhere to form a protective shield. One of these places that injury occurs is in the blood vessels of the brain. In the case of a stroke - the blood brain barrier, a VITALLY important place in the body, may rupture. In this case, the brain sends a red alert signal to flood the body with fibroblasts - all hands on deck - to protect the brain from losing blood and oxygen. This is mission critical, so all forces focus on doing that job perfectly well. After a stroke, you can actually see the scar tissue from where the fibroblasts did their job to secure the breach. But in the chaos of crisis, the brain being the most important injury, gets what it needs, so where do all of the other diligent fibroblasts go?
To the muscles - and ANY WHERE there is injury, often time where there is leaks. And repair they do, but indiscriminately as if they were repairing the brain. So, the result being that the arm, or leg suddenly develops and inappropriate repair known as a contracture.
And that is what we all see - someone who has suffered a stroke with a life long contracture, and that kind of hardened muscle tissue is so hard to restore, because it is muscle. Made for strength. And when it hardens, it doubles down on the strength because flexibility did not serve it during a crisis. Strength did.
So these complexes - in our psyche - our soul - they develop during a time of crisis, injury, wounding. But the ego, the self, was most likely at risk at the time, possibly even the will to live, the root of life. And in an effort to save the system the psyche floods the soul with a protective shield to harden against damage that would disassociate the self from life and because all things are connected, somewhere in the mind - a complex formed.
A testament that someone survived trauma.
It’s a scar, a hardening of psychic tissue, reminding you that the real perseveration took place - the soul was saved. Unfortunate for the area of life where the complex forms, in crisis, regulation goes unchecked and better to harden too much than too little and die.
So, yes - the complex not only limits movement and choice with our self, but it exists because at one time, the soul underwent a crisis, survived, but left behind a hardened tissue, because in that moment, all servants were called, and serve they did.
So, next time your complex acts up, limits your choice - seek healing, yes, continue gently flexing, yes, seek help and guidance on how to live with such a complex, but thank your soul.
It did it’s job. Because the alternative was severance. For every complex you possess, there is a part of your soul that was also saved.
I've started to say that trauma isn't permission to quit, it's permission to proceed slowly. I think you've painted an apt metaphor for that 😎🤘🏽